Written by Obes (@TheCSPod)
Welcome to the Halloween edition of Your Favorite Film is Trash, a weekly look at the flaws in some of your favorite movies. This week’s film is: Scream. Halloween is coming up on Monday, so I figured I’d take a look at the movie that brought the horror genre back from the brink of death. This movie set the stage for the shitty ass Scary Movie franchise as well as its own shitty sequels. Fun fact: did you know the original title for Scream was actually Scary Movie? Sort of brings everything into perspective, doesn’t it? It does, trust me.
Anyway, here are 3 reasons why Scream is trash.
1. Billy and Stu take way too many chances in killing Casey
The film opens with Drew Barrymore’s character, Casey Nicelookingwhitewoman, getting harassed on the phone and then murdered (remember this, I’m gonna come back to it). The thing is, the only reason they were able to do so because of Casey’s dumb mistakes. They badly misjudged their situation.
Casey could’ve called the police while Billy/Stu was in between calls to her and then run upstairs and locked herself into any of the rooms while she waited for them to get there.
The boys also had no idea if/when her parents or anyone else would be coming to the house. Casey manages to get outside without Billy/Stu knowing. Had she run without stopping, she’d have reached her parents car and been home free.
Her boyfriend would be dead regardless, though. Dead, dead, dead. Sorry, bruh.
2. Billy and Stu suck at framing people for murder
Stu decides to throw a big party at his house where he and Billy kill Stu’s girlfriend and Gail Weathers’ cameraman…for some reason. They then attempt to kill Sidney and her father and then frame Sidney’s dad for all of the murders. Hmmm…there’s a lot these guys seem to be missing.
Let’s start from the beginning of the party. Stu has Sidney’s dad hidden in a closet in the house, which is the dumbest shit ever. All it would take is for someone to open the wrong door while looking for the bathroom and the entire plan is foiled.
Next, they decide to plant both the voice machine and the cell phone supposedly used to make the creepy phone calls in Sidney’s dad’s front pocket…without making him touch either thing. Won’t it be weird that the supposed killer’s fingerprints aren’t on his cell phone or the voice machine?
They also have dude duct taped by his legs, wrists, and mouth. Unless they’re planning to give dude a bath before they kill him, he’s gonna have duct tape residue everywhere. How do you explain that?
Finally, we’ve got the matter of Stu and Billy stabbing each other in an effort to make it look like they survived a vicious attack. The movie shows that both of these guys, especially Stu, are fucking idiots. How likely are they to stab each other enough to make it look like you were attacked but not enough to get murdered? Not very. Not. Very.
Oh shit what’s that rising into the sky? Is that…is that the jig? YUP.
3. The entire movie is an allegory about the harmful effects of fragile masculinity…but on accident
We find out that the reason Billy and Stu killed Sidney’s mom is because she, in Billy’s words, was a slut who had sex with multiple men all over town…including Billy’s mother. Billy also feels that Sidney’s mom having sex with Billy’s dad is the reason his mom abandoned him. I gotta say, having watched this film to do this piece, it’s far more likely that she abandoned ole boy because she realized she’d given birth to a psychopath. Sometimes you just gotta cut your losses.
During Billy’s admission of guilt for killing Sidney’s mom, he and Stu slutshame Sidney for having sex with Billy…who had spent months trying to get her to have sex with him. Fam, doesn’t the fact that she waited so long make her like the anti-hoe? What kind of sense does this make? I’ll answer that for you, none.
Finally, the movie starts with Stu/Billy insulting Casey and calling her bitch for simply refusing to grant them a conversation.
All of the things that happen in this movie occur because Billy feels he’s owed something by women. He felt Sidney’s mom owed him her life for breaking up his parents’ marriage (notice he’s got no issue with his dad for cheating on his mom) and for being a promiscuous woman, he felt Sidney owed him sex despite her not being over her mother’s death, and he felt Casey owed him her time and her life for…some reason.
This could’ve and should’ve been a PSA about what happens when fragile masculinity is allowed to run free and instead, it’s just a bad horror film. That’s trash.